Dead Air

This sucks.

Your team suffers a massive and historic loss in the championship. Bad enough. Then you and your friends that you used to obsess over every minuscule football-related bit of news with decide to boycott all things relating to the NFL henceforth. Well, until September.

And then you realize, rather quickly, that you miss it. I admit it! I'm sorry, I can't give it up. I just can't. I'm weak, I can't help it!

But of course, its February, the deadest time of the year in sports. Free-agency hasn't even started in football yet. Spring training is just beginning. The NBA exists but I mean, who really cares about the NBA. ESPN is so desperate to fill time that they're running this ridiculous Greatest Highlight Ever special. Ooh how exciting - which highlight is better than the other? I'm on the edge of my seat. We've all seen these clips 8 million times. I can maybe for about five minutes get into the NCAA Tournament next month. And if I actually had a channel on my cable system that showed any hockey games ever, I'd maybe be able to get into hockey again but, alas, I don't.

I'm booooooooooored. And I don't know what to write about in my blog.

My friends and I are attempting to replace sitting on the couch for 12 straight hours in front of the television every Sunday with hiking various Los Angeles trails on Sundays instead. But of course, we've already been rained out on week two. Thank goodness for the Oscars...oh wait, no, that wasn't nearly as fun as a football game. Was it me or was that the most utterly dull Oscars ever? Thanks again, writer's strike.

I've also replaced my 11pm Sports Center viewing with The Daily Show and Colbert Report. That's at least a perhaps better option than before. The election is providing plenty of amusing fodder for them and that's enjoyable. Nothing like a little Mike Huckabee right before bed to give you some good dreams.

I have no doubt that I'm only a few weeks from the inevitable "watch the AFL with me" conversation with my one and only friend who does indeed, watch the AFL. I'll yet again explain to him that Arena football is boring as all hell and yes, I've tried to watch a game, and no, I would not like to try again.

Hmmm...it's 11pm. It's a weekend so no Comedy Central shows on now. Sports Center is on...maybe I'll just try it out for a second. I'm sure I'll be totally bored by an hour's worth of highlights that I don't care one bit about. I just miss those cheeky bastards at ESPN.

Great, an ad for the Sports Illustrated Giants Super Bowl DVD.

I forgot, this is why I'm not supposed to be watching ESPN for a while.

Oh cool, a new episode of Girls Next Door! That works.

I hate when the Boys are right.

In the Blink of an Eye

It is funny how things can go from so good to so bad so quickly. One moment you are happy as can be, and the next everything you've dreamt of is gone. This is how my could-have-been football season ended.


It has taken a lot of mental stablizing to be able to even write this entry, but I feel it is my duty to at least wrap up the season in some way. I'm not going to lie - the last week has not been easy. Everything my team worked for all season was taken away in just a few short minutes. Some team that had absolutely no business taking it from us did. You see this is painful - I can't even use names and the correct terminology.


You know what...forget that. This is the part where the record stops with a big screech. I have my platform and I have a lot to say. So forget the sadness and the not talking about it, I am going to rant. And if you happen to be someone who knows me well, you know when I rant, I rant big.


There is one main thing that is bothering me now that the game is over, and that is the utter cruelty and meanness that the general sporting world has shown toward my beloved (yes, they are still my beloved) Patriots. I have never seen such a thing on a national scale. I get that Spygate is clouding everything but everyone seems to have conveniently forgotten how anything relating to this season was wrapped up in the first half of the first game and has no bearing on what they accomplished. I even get that if you are a Rams fan or a Kurt Warner fan, maybe you're angry at these new allegations. Let's not even get into the conveniently timed relevations regarding 2001. But still, I'm disgusted by the behavior and comments I've seen and heard. At the Pro-Bowl last Sunday, the Patriots that participated were loudly booed upon their introductions. How horrible. These players earned a right to be there, and many of them decided to brave returning to the public eye following what can only be called an embarrassing loss, in order to take part in an honor they worked hard to achieve all season. The Pro-Bowl may be sort of meaningless these days, but its still an honor to be named to the team, and some of the Patriots wanted to revel in their reward. They never know if they'll get there again. And then they get booed. For what? Being big fat losers? They don't need the fans at the stupid Pro-Bowl to tell them that. Who knows how many of them have slept a full night since. Might I remind everyone that part of the Pro-Bowl berth is from FAN VOTING. Leave these poor guys alone. We get it - you all think we cheated and you're happy we lost. Trust me, no one felt it more than the team and its fan base. This is the option we feared the most as the wins kept piling up. Just leave us alone, you got your way.


So just when I thought I couldn't feel any worse about it all, I found that I could. Fellow Patriots fans, if you've been trying to avoid it all, this is where you should probably stop reading. I'm going to share my most horrendous experience of this last week.


One day last week I went to the gym. I'd managed to avoid pretty much every mention of the Super Bowl all week - I didn't watch TV or look online. Its a strange feeling to stop so suddenly but I couldn't bear it all. I got on a treadmill and there was no way to avoid the giant TV showing ESPN. PTI was on, which I usually enjoy, and I scanned down the headlines they post on the side to see if any of them were football-related - they weren't. I figured I was safe. I'm walking along, sweating away the calories, and the show goes to commercial break. And then I see it. A commercial begins to play, with a little logo at the bottom from the NFL Players Association - you know, the union, not the league. It's the old '72 Dolphins, having a lovely little backyard picnic in their jerseys. They're laughing, happy, having a gay old time if you will. Suddenly a truck pulls up, it says "Giants Delivery Service." The delivery man comes out and hands a box to Mercury Morris. He opens it. Inside is a football with a card that says, "Enjoy it one more year. Love, Eli." And then they flash to a billboard - "Perfectville, Pop. 1, Est. 1972."


I was in shock. Complete and utter shock. Literally I was standing there on the treadmill with my mouth wide open for a solid two or three minutes. Its just...its just...so mean!!! This commercial was made by the players' own union!!! Is it not good enough for them to just lose?? They also have to be made fun of and booed and embarrassed? It's just gross. I really want those stupid Dolphins to go away. They revel in other people's sorrow. No one is trying to take away what they accomplished. Records are meant to be broken, its just how it is. And by the way guys, lets not overlook the fact that the Patriots did win 18 consecutive games to your 17, and also played a much harder schedule than you did. I know, I know...its all meaningless unless you win the big game, but I'm trying to make myself feel better people!


Whew! That felt good! I could go on but for fear of sounding more insane than I already do, I'll leave my rant at that. All I ask, my dear readers, is that you give us just an ounce of respect. In fact, you don't even have to respect us, just don't disrespect us to our faces. I suppose the lesson has been learned. Life can change in the blink of an eye, and no one (well almost no one) is perfect. And in the end, as I have preached before, football is game. It will go on again as it has before, and the best part is that in September, the slate can be wiped clean and the stats go back to 0-0.

I want to thank everyone so much for reading my blog this year. It has been so much fun for me and I hope to keep it alive. I won't be writing weekly, but I'll be doing a few entries here and there during the offseason, while I contemplate just how both Manning boys ended up with Super Bowl rings in consecutive years.


Go Pats!


(tear)


(sniffle)


(wailing sobs)

Oh Happy Day

BEST. WEEKEND. EVER.


Incredible, just incredible. I had not even fathomed that the Divisional Playoffs could work out so perfectly (for me at least, I am sure there are many disappointed fans this week, and I understand your pain). The two teams I don't like were eliminated, embarrassingly - Dallas and Indianapolis. My team - the Patriots - won. My second favorite team of the playoffs - Green Bay - drilled their opponents in a blizzard. There are just so many more things to talk about, I'll get started!


- Tom Brady throws for the best completion percentage in the playoffs EVER. Two incompletions out of 28 attempts. 27 was a drop, and some journalists are saying that 28 was a missed penalty call. I don't care if they were short passes. The point of football is to win in whatever way you can. If that means short, you do it short. As much as we like the fancy, we don't need it. Also amazing that the Patriots can win with Randy Moss having one single catch the entire game. I guess doubling him is a pick your poison kind of situation.


- What a time for Lawrence Maroney to come into his own. We've seen flashes of his ability last year and earlier this year, but he's come alive in the last few weeks. When Jacksonville figured they couldn't allow Tom Brady to beat them himself, they left open wide holes for Maroney to push through.


- I love snow games! Green Bay is the hands-down best football town in America. One of my friends has been there for a game, and said there is nothing like it. It's the purest football one can experience. I loved how the network showed a picture of the field at kickoff and then a shot of its current state. It must have snowed 5 inches by the end of the game! And it was pretty, fluffy snow - the perfect environment for the Pack to show what they could do. Poor Seattle was barely in it. When you have a team that can recover from not one, but two fumbles in the first quarter, and end up scoring over 40 points after being down 14, you know that team is for real. I said fairly early on in the game that they could hit 40 and I was sort of laughed at, but lo and behold, who was right??


- Brett Favre is awesome. That almost-sack that became a shovel pass to Donald Lee for a first down was sick. Just sick. It will pain me if I have to root against him at some point, i.e. future time that I will not speak of too much for fear of jinxing it.


- I was one of those people who believed that the Colts defeat of the Chargers would be the lock of the weekend. How (happily) wrong we all were. I'm still wondering how the Colts managed to lose that game. They had everything going for them. The lack of media pressure, one of the loudest home fields in the league, the Defensive Player of the Year. Heck, they even knocked LaDainian Tomlinson out of the game in the second quarter, and Phillip Rivers out in the second half! How much more advantage does one need? There were several times during that game that I was just in complete and total shock. The interceptions were crazy, the officiating even worse. It felt like the league was trying to hand the game to the Colts.


- Phillip Rivers is a punk and I do not like him. Just shut up, man. Stop running your mouth. What exactly have you done again? Oh right, nothing yet. I forgot.

- A lot of people are commenting on the fact that all of the teams who rested players over the last few weeks of the regular season have been eliminated from the playoffs. There is a point there, I think. To me, there is definitely something to the idea of continuity and momentum in sports. Sure, resting the body is important, but I can see how some players or teams might just fall into a bit of a lull. I'm not one who will say that Tony Romo played badly because he was in Cabo with Jessica Simpson, but I would say that it seemed like he put it in neutral for most of the end of the season. He never appeared to regain full speed. It's easy to get caught up in the idea that your team has it together and that you don't need as much at the end as you do at the beginning. But I am starting to agree with the idea of 60 minutes of 16 games. The end is not the time to screw with momentum.


- Speaking of Tony...oh Tony. Tony, Tony, Tony. Please tell me this banner didn't really fly over Texas Stadium yesterday.




Because if that is real, then I will never stop laughing at you for the rest of the time you play in the NFL, and probably after that. As I just said, I don't think that being in Cabo with Jessica Simpson last week had anything to do with the actual game played yesterday. However, I do think it was just about the stupidest thing he could have done for his own image. I just don't get why you even open yourself up to that. Keep your personal life personal. Yes, Tom Brady dates celebrities, but do you ever see more than a picture of him out to dinner on a normal night?


- The New York Giants are playing in the NFC Championship? Excuse me...did I say that out loud? Since I wanted anyone but Dallas to win yesterday, my friends and I all rooted for the Giants, but that warmth has worn off today and now I am left with the fact that the Eli Manning-led Giants are in the NFC Championship game. Ugh. At least now we get a game in Lambeau (and they're saying single-digit temps for Sunday). But still, now that the ridiculous happiness that came along with the Cowboys' loss is receding, I'm left with the astonishment that Tom Coughlin will be keeping his job. Great.


- R.W. McQuarters has the best name ever. It sounds like he should be an 1880's newspaper mogul.


- By now if you haven't seen the clip of Terrell Owens crying about Tony Romo on national television, you live in a cave. If you are one of the crazies who haven't seen it yet, do yourself a favor and go to ESPN or NFL.com and find it. It might be the best video clip I have seen in a long time. Add to that the fact that, as one of my friends noted yesterday, he's wearing a cast-off outfit from the music video for "Beat It."


So those are my highlights from probably the best football weekend in a very long time. My apologies if it is a little disjointed, I was writing off pure giddiness. I could probably go on more. The teams I hate most lost and the ones I love won! The games were all competitive and were fun to watch. And we ended up with a combination of teams in the conference championships that give us the best chance for an incredible Super Bowl. For all the bad that the NFL has had to deal with this year, we're lucky as fans to have it end this way. I can't wait for next week!

The Final State of All the Babies

CHAMPION!

Tom Brady's Babies won the Going Deep Championship by a score of 72 to 72 over The Smithereens. Steve Smith led the team in scoring in the championship round and Drew Brees led the team in scoring for the season. Congrats once again to Tom Brady's Babies on a terrific Fantasy football Season. Hope to see you all next year!  Yes indeed my dear readers, this was the headline on my Dad's league page this morning.  Your very own Tom Brady's Babies won!!!!!!! I'm going to take a minute to gloat.  I kind of rock.  I beat my own Dad, who made it to the playoffs this year and lost in the first round and who has won his leagues the last two years.  And I beat a whole bunch of random boys.  I didn't know any of these people, it was a public league, but I was pretty sure they were all men.  I'm proud of myself.  The last day was utterly torturous.  The Eagles happened to be playing the Saints so I didn't particularly want the Saints to win, but I was expecting my boys Brees and Colston to put up their usual monster numbers.  A couple hours later the game is over, the Eagles had won, and Drew Brees hadn't thrown a touchdown pass in the entire game.  Colston had left the game in the first half with some strange injury (apparently he was coughing up blood...not good).  So at this point I think I am toast.  My savior was Steve Smith, who I had stopped even playing every week because of Carolina's painful quarterback situation.  Low and behold Smith had basically his best game of the season and caught for over 100 yards.   Luckily, I watched excitedly as most of my opponents players punked out on him as well.  Plaxico Burress laid a goose egg, as did his tight end Heath Miller.  That was helpful.  Ryan Grant was the only bit of light from that horrible Packers game and was my only other single player to get me double-digit points.  Going into the afternoon games I was ahead by only about 3 points, with both of us still having significant players left to play.  I began to panic when Kurt Warner's numbers kept growing.  This guy had switched last minute from Favre to Warner and boy was that the right decision.  If only I'd gone with my gut and put Marshawn Lynch in over Earnest Graham.  When the night game began I was a few points behind, with his team completely done and only Chris Cooley left for me.  I was sure Cooley could lock it up for me, he'd been awesome all season.  Early in the first half he catches a 33 yard touchdown pass and that ties the game 72-72.  All I need is for Cooley to get 7 more receiving yards and I've got it, but for some reason I decide to not watch the game.  A little while later my dad appears from his bedroom screaming, "Lisa oh my god!"  What what??  Cooley drops a 2-point conversion pass in the end zone.  That would have won it for me.  The Redskins lead by double digits in the second half and I know I am through - there is no way they are going to do anything but run the ball the rest of the half.  The game ends and we're left with the same score - tied.   I try in vain to find the rules on a tied championship game.  Are we co-champs (unacceptable), or is there a tie-breaker?  I check the standings.  I'd beaten him in the regular season, so I've got that tie-breaker.  I also had more total points than him - there's the second possible tie-breaker.  I've won!!!! Now you might be asking, what about the Boys' league game?  What happened there?  Well, it was over before it began.  My main man Willie Parker broke his stupid leg in the first quarter at St. Louis on freaking Thursday night!  There is no way to win a championship with only production from one running back. Not only did Willie not get me anything, he left me with a lovely NEGATIVE .10 POINTS.  Thanks, Will.  So I basically gave it up there.  I got spanked, particularly after my second running back, Willis Mcgahee, also decided to get hurt in his game and leave quickly.  It was so disappointing - these guys were two of the top running backs in the entire NFL the whole season!  They got me to the end and then they lost it for me.  Poetic, isn't it?  I admit, though, I think I'm happy to not have won that league.  I fear what would have happened to me when I got back to LA and the Boys realized they'd created a monster.  I'd have probably come back to many "sarcastic" barbs, and I wouldn't have been given an ounce of room to gloat.  I'd get upset and then the Boys would try to tell me that they weren't really being serious and I shouldn't be so sensitive, and I'd say fine, even though I wouldn't really believe that they weren't.  I'm plenty proud of a second and a first! I'm a bit sad that its over.  Fantasy football was such a nice little side distraction for a few months.  And it inspired this blog (yay)!   This Week's Favorite Things About the NFL 1.  Philadelphia is pretty amazing.  I've been at home this week and the press is pretty hypocritical (though I know I am about to hear crap for this).  All season they are calling for Reid and McNabb's heads, and suddenly a couple wins have everyone talking about how great they are. Suddenly the same people who wanted Reid to quit mid-season are talking about how much of a stand up guy he is.  Interesting. 2.  You knew I wouldn't go a week without talking about the Patriots.  First team to ever go 15-0 consecutively!  Saturday is it!  Not only could they be the first team to go 16-0, Tom and Randy Moss could both break their respective positions' touchdown records.  I can't wait!!! 3.  I really hate the Redskins and would rather them not get into the playoffs, but the Todd Collins story is one of those that I just love.  The guy has ten full years pass since his last start and wins every game he plays.  Now the Redskins only have a second-string Cowboys team in the way of their playoff hopes.  Its just incredible that things like that can happen in this league.  People can step up out of nowhere. 4.  While it was very disappointing to see Cleveland beat themselves into a hole at the worst possible moment, I was a little happy to see the Bengals finally step up and win an important game.  They have nothing to play for but they didn't just roll over to their division rivals.  Maybe its a glimmer of hope for next year from the one of the league's most disappointing teams this season.   5.  I know I go on and on about Brett Favre but there was a really adorable article about Favre and Greg Jennings on ESPN.com this week, discussing their relationship.  For those more sentimental fans, like me, its a good read. Random Thought of the Week You know what I really don't care about?  College bowl games.  I know they are tradition, and maybe I just can't get into it because I didn't go to a school with a football team (a fact that our Boston College rivals loved to constantly point out to us, yet I never really understood why, that's not really an insult).  But they just seem so pointless.  Half the kids get suspended after their semester grades come out and suddenly we're supposed to be shocked that they didn't really study.  Then the majority of the teams play meaningless games with titles like the Papajohns.com Bowl, or the San Diego Credit Union Bowl.  I guess the BCS bowls are supposed to have meaning but I'm really not sure what that is beyond the national championship.  I like Ohio State so I guess I'll watch that game but otherwise, I could not be more bored by a sport right now.  Well, I guess except the NBA.  I won't be rolling this blog over to basketball anytime soon. I hope you all had wonderful Christmases and Hannukahs!  See you next week!

It Is So Very On

I can't quite believe I did it...but I did it! I am officially in the championship game in not one, but both of my fantasy leagues. I'm actually pretty surprised at myself but I don't know why. I have two things going for me that help you win in fantasy - a lot of downtime to fiddle with my lineup and the fact that during said downtime I watch and read a whole lot of ESPN. Basically I just pay attention. But I'm not going to start the horn-tooting quite yet. I want to WIN. I have to win at least one league. So we're starting with the State of the Babies (quite good).

I don't think the Boys are surprised that I have gotten this far but I think all of the sudden the alarm bells are going off that I could realistically win. I honestly don't think I will beat my opponent, Silence of the Rams. He's been dominant the entire season and never fell from the first seed (though in support of myself, I never fell from the two spot either). He's got LT so that makes him dangerous no matter what. Right now the league matchup function projects him beating me by only about 10 points, so it could be anyone's game. Its probably good for me that we'll all be apart this weekend for the championship battle, everyone in their respective home towns for the holidays. I am not sure what the reaction will be if I do win. I hope they'll talk to me afterward.

In my Dad's league, I am playing some team called the Smithereens, who I must take down because he's the one who beat my dad this past weekend in the first round of the playoffs. I had so wished for a family matchup, particularly since we'll be watching together this weekend, but alas it didn't work out as planned. So now I must win one for the family. My dad has a pretty impressive record though - championships two years in a row and a first seed playoff berth the third. This is the game I think I can really pull off. This guy scored 79 points total last week...I scored 141. The Smiths have some players capable of breaking out though (Favre, Addai, Burress, McGahee), and he's got a couple favorable matchups. But I do too and if my team can keep rolling like it has been then I can pull off the win. Its been a strange season with that team...my running backs are Ryan Grant and Earnest Graham - two guys I had never even heard off at the beginning of the season and who are now having regular 100 yard games and most weeks are scoring at least one touchdown.

And now, in a very special guest blogging appearance, my very own Dad! He'd just like to revel and share in my awesomeness. Trust me, you'll notice family resemblance quickly as he shares his weekly highlights.

I am delighted to make a guest appearance in Lisa’s Blog.

I must congratulate her on her stellar debut performance in Fantasy Football. Regardless of the outcome of this week’s championship games, she has done a great job. I can assure you as her father that she knew almost nothing about the NFL until she started following the Patriots in college, despite cheering for the Patriots in high school. To be this savvy and successful is a great accomplishment, even though you only get bragging rights out of it. Seeing your child succeed in something is the best thing for a parent. Those of you who are not parents yet will understand someday. So well done Sasa. Ask her what that means.

And now for some random thoughts on the NFL and Week 15:

- I am now seriously rooting for the Packers. One reason is Lisa’s Grandfather, a cheesehead who has stayed loyal despite not living in Wisconsin since the Korean War. The other reason is that they will hopefully defeat the hated Cowboys in the NFC Championship.

- Where does one start in talking about the Cowgirls? There is the whining T.O., there is Jessica Simpson, there is Wade Phillips standing on the sidelines with no one paying attention to him because they know that Jason Garrett and Jerry Jones run the team. There is Romo, who despite doing a good job is not the second coming of Brett Favre yet. And, of course there is the whole America’s Team thing.

- Jessica Simpson, please. It is a football game, not E! News. It was a very good game so we did not need to see her on a regular basis. I love watching sports and do not need the extra crap that the networks bring in. I think most people agree with me on this. Just show us the game.

- One other thing about the Cowboys. Can they keep Roy Williams in the lineup forever? He is good for a personal foul every game and he cannot cover to save his life. Glad to see that he is being suspended. What a fraud.

- Unstoppable- Eli Manning. Have you seen his ad? I would say he was Citizen’s spokesperson but he does not speak in the ad. He really is getting worse. Again, the downside of their slide (they are at Buffalo and home against New England and could fall out of the playoffs) is that Coughlin would be fired. We need him in the NFC East. Coughlin could make people like Bobby Petrino.

- Finally, the Eagles. It has been a sad year for them. If they catch a punt in Green Bay and stop Brian Griese from going 97 yards in less than two minutes with no timeouts, they are in the playoffs. I have to blame the coach for this. He is a fine fellow (let’s not talk about his parenting skills, something I know about- see Lisa and Betsy) but a real stubborn guy. The team has no top rate receivers, poor return game and does not draft well. Please, Andy, get in a personnel guy and concentrate on the game. Also, look at the films. When you run well, you win. Stop calling passes on third and 1 or 2nd and 3 in field goal range late in the fourth quarter down by 3 with AJ at the helm. With the right play call there, you Patriot lovers might be looking at 18-1.

I'm not sure if you could tell but my dad really hates the Cowboys. I thought for a second, oh no, what if by some crazy chance the Cowboys beat the Patriots in the Super Bowl? What would I do? My life would be over, how could I ever watch football again? The thought is just too frightening. I am also so glad someone brought up those ridiculous Eli Manning watch ads...dear lord, what on earth would make you hire Eli Manning for an ad whose theme is being unstoppable? I know he's a lot cheaper than Peyton but its not even close! There is no way and no how Eli is unstoppable. It makes you wonder if those ad execs ever watched him play a game.
Also today was the Pro Bowl lineup announcements. Honestly not very much to comment on. People are apt to be up in arms about Fred Taylor yet again not making the team (or I guess as an alternate). But really, how do you argue against the 3 running backs - LT, Willie Parker, and Joseph Addai. I am however quite happy that Brian Westbrook finally made the roster, because it would be a travesty if he didn't. He's a top 5 back this year. I'm also a bit surprised that Drew Brees didn't get the third NFC quarterback spot but I guess the Saints just haven't been consistent enough. The Cowboys managed to squeak in a league-high 11 players, which I guess in the NFC isn't surprising, though its nauseating. I guess they're still popular or whatever and people vote for players they know, sometimes regardless of stats.

I know I promised my NFC Playoff Preview this week but in light of my guest I am pushing that to next week. By then most of it should be wrapped up. I can only hope that by this time next week, the Giants will have lost their previously-almost-guaranteed playoff spot. I would LOVE that. At least if the Saints got in instead we'd have a game in the first round, instead of wasting our time watching yet another Giants one and done playoff embarrassment. And with any luck, Tony Romo's thumb boo-boo will provide the Cowboys a one-way ticket to Lambeau Field in January. Here's hoping!

Random Thought of the Week

You heard it here first (ok well courtesy of Perez Hilton) but Britney Spears' younger 16 year old sister is pregnant!!! Can you even believe this? Well yes of course we can because we can now be more sure than ever that the Spears' are pure trash. This girl stars in her own Nickelodeon series that is the most watched show on the network. Way to screw that up. Have these girls never heard of the birth control pill? My lord! What a royal idiot.

That's all for this week. I wish all my friends and family a wonderful holiday and a relaxing vacation (if you are taking one). I'll be traveling back to Pennsylvania tomorrow for about 10 days. Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukkah!

AFC Playoff Preview

How can you not be in love with this man...he's too perfect. Earlier this week he'd made this comment in response to Steeler's safety Anthony Smith's "guarantee" of a Pittsburgh win:


"Well done is always better than well said. That's been the motto of this team.''


Peter King, who everyone knows my favorite NFL writer, admired Tom just as much as I did in making such a profound comment in reaction to something that could have caused other players to be pretty upset. So he asked him where he got it from, and this was his answer:

"Ben Franklin said that. I learn from where we all have, my dad!"


The man quotes Ben Franklin. I could just fall over from love.


I won't go on too much about this weekend's game. I think the game has said all that is needed to be said itself. I really feared the worst, because the Steelers are basically the better versions of the Eagles and Ravens. But I should not have feared, because Belichick knew exactly what to do with the team to get them back in the right place. A little anger and a little rest were all they needed. Now Tommy is five touchdown passes in three games away from breaking that record. Randy Moss is only four touchdowns in three games away from breaking Jerry Rice's record of 22 receiving TDs in a season - a record that has been previously thought to be untouchable. The amazing part is that I will be more surprised if they don't make these records than if they both do.


I am skipping over the State of the Babies section this week because it was an unimportant week in fantasy. Playoffs begin next week and both of my leagues are locked up already. I will be the number two seed in the Boy's league and I am not sure about the other one, but I think I will be three. The only thing I care to point out is that the first place Boy decided this week to "rest his starter" and still beat the piss out of his opponent with Kellen Clemens. That was pretty funny.

Instead, I'm going to do my first annual Playoff Preview, starting with the AFC!


Currently, the AFC playoff picture looks like this:


1. New England Patriots (13-0, AFC East, home-field, and 1st round bye already locked)

The only question is undefeated or not!

2. Indianapolis Colts (11-2, playoff berth locked, should win AFC South this week)

Barring a total collapse the next few weeks and massive Jacksonville surge, the Colts will tie up the other 1st round bye. And considering their rout of Baltimore this week, we should all be slightly scared of them.

3. Pittsburgh Steelers (9-4, should win AFC North)

The Steelers lucked out in that they've swept their division games against the Browns, who are just a game back. They have another very tough game against Jacksonville next week. They need to win that and keep those pesky Jags away from them in the playoffs.

4. San Diego Chargers (8-5, should win AFC West this week)

Scaring the crap out of their fans weekly. They've gotten some lucky breaks and managed to pretty much secure the West. The rest of the division has faltered and that has certainly helped because this team can be lucky to be called mediocre. If they can run the table, they have an outside chance of moving to the 3rd seed. They should hope so, because I don't think the Jags would be a very good matchup for them.

5. Jacksonville Jaguars (9-4)

The Jags have all but locked up this first Wild Card seed. They shouldn't even need to win at Pittsburgh next week to do it, considering how easy their last two games are. I tell you - I wouldn't want to have to play them in the first round.

6. Cleveland Browns (8-5)

Well, well, well. Cleveland - what are you doing here? Next week's game at Buffalo will be key, but their other two games are also very winnable (at Cincinnati, SF). I think if they can take 2 out of 3 they will remain in the 6th spot. Buffalo is the next team below them and they have a tough ending schedule.

I really like what is going on in Buffalo these days but I think they are too young and too banged up to move above the Browns. They also have a much harder schedule, facing Cleveland, Philly, and the Giants in the last three weeks.


So this means that the first round games would be Cleveland at Pittsburgh and Jacksonville at San Diego. Pittsburgh beats Cleveland in a close one, where the Browns make it a game but aren't able to close it up. They are young and this will be the first postseason game for almost the entire team. They won't be quite ready. Jacksonville beats San Diego on the road. Don't they always say that defense and a good running game wins in the playoffs? Jacksonville is about as good on both of those fronts as a team can be. San Diego (possibly lacking Shawne Merriman and Lorenzo Neal - huge losses for them) won't be able to take away the Jags run game. San Diego loses again in the playoffs, at home.


That makes round two Pittsburgh at Indy, and Jacksonville at New England. From what we saw of Pittsburgh this weekend, I think Indy will pick them apart, especially at the RCA Dome where they have a massive home field advantage. New England beats Jacksonville because well, they just do. Though admittedly I don't think it will be an easy win. I predict the Pats giving up a lot of yardage, but outscoring the Jags with their incredible passing game. The Jags receivers aren't good enough for them to be able to outscore the Pats.

Of course that brings us right back to yet another Indy at New England AFC Championship game. The Pats win in a for-real shootout (not the same battle as their regular season game, due to the Colts defensive injuries).

Come on, did you really think this would lead to anything but the Pats going to the Super Bowl? NFC next week!



This Week's Favorite Things in the NFL:

1. The crowd at Gillette Stadium chanted "Guarantee!" at the end of the game last weekend. I love it! They say the crowd there has gotten complacent, so it makes me happy to hear them stay in it like that.

2. I'm officially kind of into the Vikings. They can still win even when Adrian Peterson gets 3 whole yards? That's what I call a turnaround. Say what you will about the parity issues in this league, but I love the fact that teams can come out of nowhere.

3. The Bears are going to start Kyle Orton next week, the guy who started the season as the number 3 on the depth chart. Then Rex Grossman comes out and says he'd love to be back with the Bears next year. Sweetie...its over. You were benched, for a guy who is almost 10 years older than you, then lose the job yet again (ok fine he's hurt but its clearly not that bad). Just move on, with the utter lack of decent quarterback play this year, some team will take a gamble on you.

4. Through all the turmoil this year, I still really like Drew Brees, a lot. I just watched that ESPN commercial where he can't get through the security gate on his Mardi Gras float and he's really funny. And if you watched any of the horrible MNF game yesterday, you saw his absolutely sick performance. Accurate is an understatement. And he happens to be one of my fantasy QBs :)


Random Thought of the Week

On the complete opposite end of football, I think I am officially over The Hills (its an MTV show for anyone who doesn't know). They made this huge deal over the finale episode last night, only to have nothing remotely surprising or interesting happen. Oooh Lauren goes to Paris for what, 2 weeks? Then they make another huge deal about Lauren revealing some kind of "secret" after the show, and the secret turns out to be that they are doing more episodes. Um, lame.

This Week in Review

What a fun week! Don't you love having three days of football games in one week? Considering the utter wasteland that television is right now, it certainly helps to add a day on. It was an action packed week, so lets take a look at the highlights through the week...

THURSDAY

Ooh boy, I was excited for this one. Packers at Cowboys - the Sheriff versus the young gun (GRRR Romo). I didn't truly believe that the Packers could win this one on the road but an NFC Championship game at freezing cold Lambeau Field sure did sound like an exciting way to end the season, and would hopefully set up my ideal Super Bowl - a 1996 rematch of Patriots versus Packers. Alas, it did not quite go that way. Brett Favre got HURT. It was painful to watch him on the sidelines. His eyes were hollow and at times he couldn't even put his helmet down. One look into those eyes and you understood why this man cannot retire - he does not know what to do with himself when he isn't playing football. Aaron Rodgers came for Favre and surprised everyone who witnessed his half of a game played last year, where he looked like crap and went on to break his leg instead of assuring Packer Nation that he was the heir apparent. The kid played well and I am no longer completely concerned that the Packers will be flushed down the toilet when the Sheriff does eventually retire. He has to sometime, right? I think? Read his profile for SI's Sportsman of the Year, its fascinating.

SUNDAY

I was up late on Saturday night for a friend's birthday party but I thought, hey, I'll still set that alarm for 9:55am, and I'll lay in bed and watch the Eagles. This should be a good game, right? The Eagles played well against the Patriots, there was some hope if they could do it again and pull out a win, right? That would be a big old no. I definitely should have stayed asleep. I think its safe to say that Philadelphia's one-week love affair with AJ Feeley is officially over. When you stare down your receivers and throw continually into triple-coverage, that ball will be picked off. Multiple times. And with those picks goes the Eagles playoff hopes. The game was flat-out ugly, not helped by the vicious sleet and wind, and the play-calling was horrendous. I said to one of my friends earlier this week that Seattle had a speedy secondary, and they'd need to run the ball a lot to get anything done. Yet again, the Eagles insist on throwing entirely too much when they have one of the best runners in the game, Brian Westbrook. A couple of the Boys came up with a theory that Westbrook isn't taken seriously because Brian is too wimpy of a name for a running back. Maybe he should change it to Bryondo or something.

MONDAY

I knew I put that dang bracelet on for a reason. Something pulled me to my little silver jewelry box and I took out my little leather Brady bracelet (the leather looks like a football - its adorable) and put it on before I left my house to watch the game on Monday night. I was actually nervous not wearing my jersey. Last week I hadn't worn it for the first half, and after I left my location and went home, I put it on again just to try to change the cosmic vibes. And it did work (well, I think AJ Feeley just made a crappy play but still). Somehow we kept those cosmic vibes and some way, some how, remain undefeated, a proud 12-0! I know I sound like a greedy fan to say this but, the Pats didn't look good. They looked like crap actually. Randy Moss had 34 yards. We gave up 166 rushing yards because we could not tackle at all. The offensive line struggled and Brady got sacked several times. My friends and I prepared ourselves mentally to lose. We started talking about how it meant nothing to have one loss and that it wouldn't change our playoff stature. And then came the stupidest time out on the planet.

As a very special addition this week, I have a guest-blogger! My friend Lauren can continue on to tell us about this game, as she was in attendance. She's a Raven's fan, but we'll forgive her this once.

Tommy Can You Hear Me? Tommy Can You See Me?

For those of you who don’t know me – I’m Lisa’s good friend from college. I like to think that her passion for football started when she attended my Super Bowl party freshman year in which the Ravens played the Giants. Being from Baltimore, I have been a true Ravens fan through and through…Lisa saw me that day in probably one of my most intense moments… let’s just say I am a passionate fan. While I don’t think it’s appropriate to give myself full credit for Lisa’s love of football, I like to think I had something to do with it. So, thank you Lisa for letting me be your first guest blogger.

That said. I have to admit that this season for me has been all about the Patriots. Yes, I am admitting to being a fair weather fan or more accurately, fair weather Tom Brady fan. (I also just love how cute Tom Brady and Randy Moss are together. Boy love. Gotta love it). When my Dad told me I was invited to the Ravens/Pats game (he’s a season ticket Ravens holder) I looked at it as an opportunity to meet my future husband (the child out of wedlock – just a blip on the radar, of course).

Nothing was going to stop me from going to that game. Not 50 mph winds. Not a cold. Nothing was going to keep me in the way of my Tommy…except maybe the Ravens. At the start of the game, I informed those around me that I would be making my love for Tommy known throughout the game – the cheer I came up with is the title of this entry.

Something got in the way. The Ravens decided to show up.

We had planned to leave the game at halftime – expecting the score to be 20 – 0. Now mind you, all throughout the game deep down I knew it was going to be a heartbreaker, but part of me started to think could
the impossible really be possible? Emmitt Smith had said yes on Monday NFL Countdown… maybe he was right.

WRONG.

We forgot I think… us Ravens fans… that Brian Billick is our coach.

Now, I know defensive coordinator Rex Ryan called the time out. I know we had a lot of stupid penalties (and have the most in the NFL), but in my opinion Brian Billick is the worst coach out there:

Time Management: Do I really need to elaborate on this?
Play Calling: Do I really need to elaborate on this?
Stupidity: Do I really need to elaborate on this?

The truth is if the Ravens are going to get me to leave my Tommy for good – and move on, they are going to have to let Billick go…We all Know Kyle Boller isn’t the best, but he certainly is hot… and let’s face it, he doesn’t have a child…at least that we know of.

With all that said, I would like to congratulate MY Ravens on a hard-earned effort. You fell just short of knocking off one of the best teams – and quarterbacks to ever play the game.

Wow, I feel for ya girl. And you should be proud of the first 55 minutes that the Ravens played. You definitely managed to scare the beejesus out of us Pats fans.

Can't you see why Lauren and I are friends?



The State of the Babies

I'm just going to gloat for a minute. I have to. I told everyone at the beginning of the season that I'd be good at fantasy football. Well, I AM GOOD AT FANTASY FOOTBALL. I sit at a computer and answer phones all day. I have plenty of time to be updated on everything happening in the NFL. I drafted well, I made some good pickups throughout the season and now I have made the playoffs in both of my leagues! Wooooohoooooooooooo!

Ok so now that the gloating is over, I will admit that I lost both my games this week. Oops. I was playing the number one team in the Boys' league this weekend and I was pretty sure that I'd actually win up until yesterday. This team had LT, who scored him over 30 points, but I'd gotten almost as many from Peyton. Going into Sunday night, I still had both of my running backs (Willie Parker and Willis McGahee) to play as well as the New England defense. My opposition had one player left - Ravens receiver Derrick Mason. Do you see where I am going with this? Both of us thought that Mason would do nothing, and my remaining players would each get me a bunch of points. Well as we know, it didn't quite go that way. The Ravens are just cramping my style this week.

I also lost in my Dad's league, again to someone who had LT. I just had to be playing both of these teams in the week he finally breaks out, huh. I was sure I would win, so it was a big letdown. I thought I was doomed when I got to the point where I had to start Ryan Grant and Earnest Graham, but they've been great. Ryan Grant has had a touchdown every week I've played him. Receiver was my issue yet again. I chose to not start Kevin Curtis this week and of course he had over 100 yards. Colston has been hot and he had one catch (granted it was a pretty awesome catch). Still though, I'm going to be a division winner and will get into the playoffs. My dad is winning the entire league at 9-2. He's won his leagues the last two years as well. I can't argue - he's the man.

Now if only we can make a last surge in our Family Pick-em League.


This Week's Favorite Things in the NFL:

1. Brian Billick's kisses. Please tell me you all saw this moment. Rodney Harrison makes a clutch defensive play almost directly in front of where Billick is standing on the sideline. Turns right to him afterward and says something in his face. As he turns away, Billick, so smug, looks right at him and blows him a single kiss. Then moves his mouthpiece away and gives him two more. Priceless.

2. Tom Brady's postgame interviews. Whew, man does NOT like to play badly. He was downright salty and smartass to the reporters. You could tell he was mad at himself more than anyone else out there, but not exactly beaming with pride toward his teammates. Ok, am I the only one who things the anger was kinda hot? Anyone?

3. Adrian Peterson (the good one) is unreal. Just unreal. He's also just kind of adorable, he's this beast but he's a baby.

Random Thought of the Week

STRIKE. END. PLEASE.